Over the years, Renee and I have often gotten into conversations with friends about sex. And the topic of sex toys will often pop-up. We’ve heard some of our friends say that, “sex toys aren’t useful” or that they aren’t “natural”. Or that they just don’t have them or use any.
What a shame. There are some strong myths out there. Let’s break a few.
Myth #1: Sex products are artificial. Sex should be natural, and using sex products makes it fake.
Truth: Sex toys and sex products are natural. People have been using toys and erotica for thousands of years! Even animals use sex toys! Our primate cousins, for one example, have been observed using tree branches for masturbation. I’ve even seen a chimpanzee use the open mouth of a toad for masturbation! (Poor toad).
We should recognize that we do lots of wonderful things that aren’t “natural.” We watch TV, we ride two-wheel and four-wheel machines with engines, we wear clothing, cook gourmet meals, etc. Eating is one of the most basic natural impulses — and yet we’ve created and made use of countless enhancements for cooking, without worrying about it being “unnatural.”
Sex is a natural impulse. We have no argument there. But it’s also something that we learn, practice and explore. We humans are primates with big, efficient brains, and using our brains to gain skills or to use tools is as natural as spinning webs is to spiders.
Practical lesson: If you start worrying about whether sex toys are “natural” or not, ask yourself how often you worry about the “unnatural” act of driving a car, marinating a steak or using toilet paper in the bathroom. And then relax.